OH MY GOD Brad Leone and Jimmy Diresta are cut from EXACTLY the same cloth, and it's amazing
especially if this is your first winter on estrogen. your body is several degrees colder than it was on T, and if you're on E alone, your extremities are getting even less circulation. That cold will translate to anxiety in your core. Make plans for personal heat, either heating pads or cuddly hot water bottles.
Y'know who's been with you every day of your life? Who saw everything you've been through and felt all the joys and hurts?
You. You made it through that.
I want you to find a mirror or open your phone camera. Look at yourself. You're still here, and I'm still here, and I'm glad we're out here together.
so like let's say, out of curiosity, that i wanted to hop on the #novembeat train, i want to try and make digital music, i have never written digital music before, but i am pretty familiar with the basics of music. oh and also i'm on linux
does anyone have any recommendations for programs i should play around with?
practical knowledge (bondage related)
Got on the YouTubes, got my rope out, and practiced some ties. It went well; everything I knew came back.
This is FAR better than the last time I actually tied C., when I looked at a notebook full of tips and it'd been so long that I couldn't figure out a single goddamned thing. NUTHIN'.
It's really important to keep your hand in at the practical skills you learn. Even riding a bike isn't like riding a bike.
I may spend the rest of the day grinning and saying, "Ith a waw! Ith a waw at Unthinthuh'd!" 😹 ❤️
He's going to have a Dusty "He got a bithycle!" moment within the next six months, and I can't wait to replay it 8000x
I'm definitely angry again. *sigh* I should read a book or something.
It makes all of us a little angry because each of my partners has more reason to disavow their blood, and neither of them could ever imagine doing it. I simply don't want or need the fucking hassle, and I'm the only one who genuinely wishes my family were just gone, that I would never have to deal with a random-ass selection of people I would not choose in a thousand years to be "mine" or I "theirs".
None of us get it.
They choose to keep their necks in leashes, largely unobtrusive until the sudden, unforeseen, unpredictable moments those ties strangle their emotions.
I would permanently cut those ties. My partners want to instead form relationships with the leashes' distant holders. They talk of wishing they could loosen their own collars while insisting I not take off mine.
I don't think we'll ever truly understand each other here.
Suddenly thinking of The Consequence of Blood this morning. Every day, every moment, I wish the generations above me in my bloodline would see a Boojum; would softly and suddenly vanish away, and never be met with again.
Neither of my partners understands this. It's a sticking point that rears its head occasionally. Likewise, I don't comprehend their internal prohibitions on writing their own forebears off.
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