family illness
Dang. My granny (my dad's mom, and my only surviving grandparent) is in the hospital after what may? have been a stroke.
My aunt was present when it happened, discovered her right away, immediately called 911. It could've been far worse.
Granny's pretty dang old at this point, though, and as the doctors examined her, they discovered her pacemaker needs a new battery. That's a pretty invasive surgery for someone her age.
If she passes, a lot of uncomfortable things happen.
family illness
Most of those uncomfortable things are due to inheritance.
Granny has three living children:
✅ A married, well-off, Type-A, rabidly Christian daughter
✅ A widowed, dependent daughter who's lived with her as caretaker when it's mostly the other way around
✅ A retired son (my dad), married, doing okay financially but nowhere along the lines of my aunt, A.
Discussions of the will already lead to past unhappiness. I don't know what fights may happen when it's probate time.
family illness
My Paw-Paw was pretty shrewd financially, and of course the times were different. Granny will pass down a substantial amount of savings, stock holdings, etc.
It's almost all set down in the will to go to my dad.
My dad's trucking along, but has heart issues, and has for years.
If Granny passes, I am suddenly randomly eligible for a whole bunch of fucking Death Money. It's a horrible goddamned countdown timer.
So YEAH, this is unwelcome news on every emotional front.
family illness
My mom doesn't want me to worry, as there's incredibly little I can do. This is true.
I'm blessed and cursed to see many facets of things, though, and this is a master-crafted gemstone of "fuck", just ready to hit the light of day and start blinding people.
family illness
@thraeryn Mum is right this is fully out of your hands. But I hope everything goes as gently as it possibly can because shit like this is never easy.
family illness
@TheLizardQueen
Thanks. ❤️ It's a lot to see unfolding. I really hope we can defer.
family illness
@thraeryn soz to hear this. hopefully her estate won’t be contested. we sometimes see this happen in work.
you call your gran, paw paw as in the Chinese word?
family illness
@applecandy
My deceased grandfather, yes. I was never sure where the name originated.
family illness
@applecandy
Thanks for the wishes. I also hope the estate won't be contested when the time comes, even if it's simply due to everyone being in shock. The relationships between my dad and his sisters are already strained sometimes. They don't need a new fight.
family illness
@thraeryn it’s really horrible when families do this.
I always think that karma comes to those who do bad when they get older so they’ll end up seeing how they behaved when they were younger.
family illness
@applecandy
Could be. I honestly don't know what skeletons may be in their respective closets.
I just really hope my granny recovers well, pushing all of this back to maybe a more stable set of circumstances.
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family illness
My granny may never have understood me; she always loved me, deeply. I am her first grandbaby, and I'm pretty sure Beeper is her first great-grandbaby. She always did her best to show me how much she cared, right down to making me and me alone fried chicken because the boiled shrimp she spent the afternoon making for everyone else disgusted me.
To say I don't want her to go is an understatement.